The hum of iridescent bulbs warms the night, with an occasional industrial whir casting sparks into the neon haze. These pockets of light are beacons for addicts. We scurry out of our holes after sleeping the day away. I round the corner and am shoulder checked into the wall. My hands grip around the man’s damp shirt as I catch his lifeless gaze. Tears stream down his face, but he is not present. I can smell the pain dripping off of his body. I know where he has been. I release him and watch him stumble across the street, disappearing into the darkness. I wipe the drool from my chin. My heart is beating faster now. This is all I live for. I pull the hood over my head and rush towards my destination several blocks over. My silhouette casts down a set of stairs in a pink border. This will finally be my night.
Mauricio stands over my shadow, shaking his thick dreaded hair. “I told you not to come back here Osbe,” he sighs.
I gasp for air. How long have I been standing here? I place my trembling hands into my pockets and attempt to breathe normally. I want to sprint past him and bypass these pleasantries, but this is all part of the act. I’ll do anything to get inside. At the bottom, I fall into Mauricio’s reluctant embrace.
“C’mon man. Your mother would hate to see you like this.” He pulls me away holding my shoulders. “You’re already starting to get the sweats.”
“I have to find out what happened to them,” I reply in desperation. “I’ve seen glimpses of the truth.”
“We have almost made it through all of the programs. You’ll kill yourself before you see any truth.” He shoves me back into the wall. “Please just get out of here.”
I continue to plead rapidly, “You have to have something older. I can find it if I’m closer to the source code. Just give…”
Mauricio slams his fist against the door frame. “ENOUGH!!” His body lifts with his next breath and slouches with a long exhale. He leans toward me now, almost whispering, “I found an old program that I made when I first started coding. I will make a deal with you.”
I wipe the snot and tears away with my sleeve. My voice cracks in a hasty response, “Anything!”
“If this doesn’t work, I don’t ever want to see your face around here again.” He lifts my feet off the ground, pinning me to the wall. I can’t see the words behind his clenched teeth, but I can feel them in my bones, “I will make your regret ever stepping foot through these doors again.” With that, he puts his arm around me and walks me inside.
The smell always hits you first, a damp metallic rot. I navigate a maze of wires that line the decaying walls and floorboards. There are no doors, every room a glimpse into my future. Mauricio holds his arm out to stop me and walks into one of the rooms. A shirtless pale man lays in a pool of perspiration with wires hooked into the side of his neck.
Mauricio gestures for me to come in with a nod. “When we hook you up, you’ll only be safe for about ten minutes,” he says. He snaps gloves onto his hands and applies cream to the abrasions on the man’s body surrounding the electronic input. He speaks with care, “If you are going to kill yourself, then I am going to make sure you are taken care of in the process.” He wipes the man’s brow with a rag and repositions the fans to a different cooling angle.
We proceed down the hall, and he sits me in a recliner just a few rooms down. He lubes the jack and hole in the side of my neck. He brushes the hair from my shoulder and completes the connection. Mauricio boots up a wall of computers on the opposite side of the office. A familiar blue glow lights up a jungle of cables and engineering. He glides over in his chair and reclines me back. How many times am I going to stare at this depressing ceiling?
He hovers over me and says, “Remember 10 minutes. I will pull you out at any sign of distress.” He ruffles my hair, “I’m rooting for you man. Prove me wrong.”
I nod at him with a smile and place my gaze back to the ceiling as Mauricio glides back to his station.
“You know the drill. Just lose yourself at sea while I load the program.” He turns his back and goes to work.
At his request, I focus on the intricate designs carved into the ceiling. The computer light flickers over the images as they slowly come to life. Large wooden shapes float over a dark sea. However, something unexpected happens this time around. A bright white light illuminates the water and I can’t take my eyes off of it. It lulls me to sleep. I feel myself tumble over the ship’s railing as I am jarred awake within the program. I see the room falling away above me and try to scream out to Mauricio. Something is definitely not right about this. The freezing waters envelop me and I am pulled backwards into the darkness.
